Moments Like These

This week has been amazing! I'm not quite sure why, but for whatever reason I feel like I've grown A TON in the past week or so. It's weird, you're right! But.. it's true! (Heh..) -- I had that moment the week where everything just kind of made sense. My stress is gone for the first time in this past year, I feel happier, more confident, and I feel comfortable in my own skin. Of course it's not perfect, and I still have so much room to improve, but  -- I don't know, I feel like after this long battle of concern and self-doubt I've finally been able to accept who I am and everything I've done. It's neat, really. It's like having a really beat -up car and thinking "Oh yeah, haha - I remember that dent.. that's when I reversed across the street into a fire hydrant.. That was so funny!" -- recognizing your weaknesses, and accepting them as learning opportunities, I suppose! Haha -- I also had that crazy movie moment this week where I looked in the mirror and was totally surprised by how old I look. ..Silly, right? Hah~ maybe it's just me.

And my new area, Geumcheon, is tooo cool. It's a lot like my greenie area, Bupyeong, and is teeming with friendly people. As of now, we have one investigator we're working with whose wife, son, and daughter are members, as well as a Less-Active we're trying to get to come back to church who is 19 or so years old. He spent 4 or 5 years with his mom in England, and has a Korean -English accent when he speaks, hahaha. It's intense. He's rad.

And.. Elder Eddy is THE MAN. I know I probably say that about every companion that I have, but I mean it -- he's amazing. His last companion/trainer was Elder Gibbons, who just went home because his body was literally falling apart. (Legs, feet, hip, you name it). And Elder Eddy had been working hard learning everything about the area and pushing poor ol' Grandpa Gibbons (his mission name) around in his wheelchair. They both worked so hard. 

Elder Eddy is 19, like me, and was born a month earlier in July 1995. He's from Kaysville, UT, and loves just about every thing there is to love. We get along super well, and have been working super hard this past week. The coolest thing about Elder Eddy though, is how generous he is. It's crazy. His trainer, Elder Gibbons once said, "I want my kids to understand that giving a gift is better than having a gift." -- and even though Elder Eddy isn't his real son, he totally understands that. It blows my mind. Day 1 and I'm learning tons from this guy. He is constantly sharing -- always trying to give out candy and CTR rings in his broken Korean to kids on the street and at church, preparing food for us and always offering to do everything. He's amazing. One day Elder Ellsworth (not my son, the other one) and Elder Eddy were talking, and Elder Eddy said something so rad that Elder Ellsworth actually wrote it down. Haha it said, " I always thought that if I ever got rich I'd spend my money on poor people. ..But whey would Got trust me with money if I'm not willing to spend it on poor people while I'm poor?"

As missionaries, we learn so much from those we live with, and we're often taught and influenced by the things they personally experience and learn just like you might be influenced by your close friends or family. In the outside world, though, it sometimes seem too common a practice among people to hardly know each other, or themselves. This world, and our lifetime is so packed with infinite experiences and opportunities that amidst them all we often just find ourselves lost - wasting time, not really doing much, content with the static and common practice of simply passing time. ..Haha now, I'm not saying we should all go crazy and make our lives incredibly busy with as many activities as possible; nor am I reprimanding or accusing you of wasting time (because let's be real, I was probably the King of it back home..) --but learning how to really understand why time is important is something everyone should learn. My dad put it this way. (Sorry if you've read this before, but it's awesome.)

"..As I grow older, I realize more and more that it is only the moment you are in, right now, this very minute - this fleeting second - that is the most important moment. We don't get any of these moments back. We don't get to redo them. We don't get to relive them. We can only replay them in our minds. I guess I pass that thought on to you because I know you're getting flooded with moments right now and are eager and excited for what's next. Relax - take it in - breathe in every little detail of every little thing that you are lucky enough and privileged enough to experience. Even the moments you hate or that madden you or that you can't wait to end... even those moments are worth being conscious in. ..Stay awake in the moments of your life.  ...LIVE them, LEARN from them, EMBRACE them. They will define who you are, and you will define what they mean in your life to come."

These past few weeks or so I've experienced a LOT of moments. You have too! And though maybe you feel like you haven't changed at all, you're probably taking this moment to contemplate something you've never really thought about before. ..And that's rad. Keep growing, keep fighting, keep beating the odds. Keep your head up, and keep changing people's lives with the ways you decide to capture and take advantage of YOUR moments. Set goals and follow your dreams and make things happen. You can do anything. Heavenly Father has chosen the time and the place for each of us to grow, so we can learn the lessons we personally need and do the most good with our talents and personalities among the lives of others. ..And sometimes, you won't even realize all those moments that are happening right before your eyes, and that's okay. That's the thing about knowledge; sometimes you gain it without knowing. You can't be fixed in 2 years. ..That's something I've learned. We can't fix ourselves in 2 years - otherwise, why would God have given us an entire lifetime to prepare to meet Him? He knows every single effort that we make, and I promise that as you try hard to do your best, as long as your heart feels good you will be doing alright. Keep trying. Trust yourself. Love yourself the way you are. Don't change to fit society. Defy the odds, kill the game, and understand yourself so you can do what you know is right inside. 

You are who you choose to be!

I love you all, have a tremendous week!!

All the love,

Elder DeMille!